Rating of
2.5/4
"The Thing" by Yojimbo
Yojimbo - wrote on 03/28/14
An Arctic research team discovers an alien spaceship buried in the ice and unwittingly unleashes a hostile life form that is capable of absorbing and duplicating any living creature it comes into contact with. Touted as a prequel to John Carpenter's seminal horror classic, every single major plot point is exactly the same as the 1982 film and so this "reinvention" is really just yet another example of Hollywood's seeming attempt to remake every film of the 1980s. In fact, like The Invasion before it, The Thing is in fact a remake of a remake and while Carpenter's film was a sublime exercise in paranoia and suspense, this version follows the usual modern horror formula of "hottie chased through darkened rooms by CGI monster". That's not to say that this film is awful by any means and it is in fact a pretty decent shocker and the bridging sequence during the closing credits is actually really well done. But given the choice between "stone cold classic" and "okay monster movie" I know which I'd choose every time, which begs the question "What was the point...?"
