Rating of
3/4
Action and Every Cliche in the Book!
turtlehead43 - wrote on 03/23/08
I've seen just about every zombie movie, action movie, and apolyptic future movie out there. This one combined elements from all of them! If you were intending to see something new and awe-inspiring, then you shouldn't have been at this movie in the first place. Anyone who watches any TV commercial would know what they were getting into ahead of time...I've read other reviews and everyone is down on this movie already, well I'm not. There isn't a great plot so I'll cut to the chase and explain what I possibly could have liked about it.
The typical plague of course to begin with...this time it's The Reaper virus (think a mild form of "Rage" from 28 Days Later). There is some killing at the border reminiscent of the recent Children of Men. A lone child gets out on a chopper, but not before losing an eye to a soldier's bullet. The border wall actually looks pretty realistic, and is welded up from the inside after chopping off a hand. The computer graphic stuff to set the scene of the movie looks like the old graphics from Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (TV show from the 80's, not the more recent movie). The typical team of commandoes is sent in, think Resident Evil style. They are led by, of course, the cyclops chick, with her handy removable recording eye, pretty cool, but it's been done before. How about a removable super-sniffing nose instead? Some basic killing scenes, gunning down the enemy, should have been daylight for more visuals, but hey!...They do a cool drop in an abandoned elevator shaft with an exploding foam grenade, to stop from getting injured Cool Idea!, cliche from Demolition Man, but not bad, just the same.
The protagonist gets captures by the bad guys, and has to fight off a bad guy or two, rescue some chick, and get away from the army of freaks...Combination of Road Warrior / No Escape style bad guys. There is a lame torture scene, ending with a wasted beer poured over the protagonist's head, this would have been an ideal spot for a cheesy Schwarzenegger one-liner or two thrown in for good measure, maybe "Add an Egg, and I'll have a good shampoo going!" Oh well, no such luck.
There is a new twist on the crazy warrior freak show thing, this time they are cannibals, who roast and eat one of the good guys. Not a bad concept. But the Fine Young Cannibals soundtrack was a bit silly, even for this film. Reasonably staged fight scene (also should have been in daylight) that ends with decapitation of the bad guy's girlfriend, and a great sword throw, that almost kills the chief bad guy! There are some brief running sequences to regroup the team...very similar to The Warriors, especially the bus chasing them with the Turnbull A.C's was it? The good guys actually make it out of there...jumping onto an old steam train, almost an old western style chase, or perhaps a nod to Thunderdome. I was hoping for a few good arrow shots, and maybe a hand getting ripped off like Mad Max, but alas! There is a few minutes of relative calm. With some brief explanation of what's going on. Then the movie almost turns into Lord of the Rings. Some great shots of Scottish highlands, then duck into the cliche abandoned military complex, full of Indiana Jones style crates. This movie just gives you a bit of everything !
Out the other side, and we are deinitely in Lord of the Rings complete with nasty Knights in Armor, AKA Orcs, or bad guys from Conan the Barbarian. The three remaining team members decide to play it cool here to reach the elusive Kane, who will spill the beans about the virus! A bit of unlikely torture for the undeserving girl, and a reasonable fight scene with some serious blood ! Very like Gladiator, or Conan the B, or even Highlander. A quick escape from these middle ages nutters, puts the team back in the military underground vault. They have a little time to load up with some goodies, and jump in a Bently coupe, and escape through the extremely s l o w l y c l o s i n g blast doors, just before watching some agonizing arrow shots that kill the co-star good guy, oh well, we needed a bit of tragedy, to really get the anger going!!! There is a quick bit of driving looks almost like an episode of Top Gear, sorry, that's real (ish). Let's say James Bond instead. Then call up the politicians to meet and greet, but not before a Road Warrior style car chase that everyone was waiting for...
Well, the vehicles were okay, I would have done a better job chopping them myself, and maybe used a few old Land Roversor trucks, but I don't know who they got to do the FX? Igot the feeling by the time this bit was filmed the budget was dwindling. A good closeup of a tow truck motto "Your Shit is our Bread and Butter", I think that was the best bit of writing in the movie so far, and somewhat aptly describes the movie itself ! There is good cop car chase with a car going off a cliff, but I was expecting a close up of a screaming driver, or a burnt victim after it hit ! There are a few halfway decent car to car jumps, and some reasonable arrow shots. The end is pure combination of Road Warrior & Mad Max, complete with a squashed eyeball ! Then finally a meeting the politicians, and the whole slimy episode is caught on the eyeball cam and recorded for all the world to see by the only remaining good guy !
Well, what can I say? More cliches, than any movie I've seen. Cliche action shots, cliche weapons, cliche characters, even cliche songs ! This is the movie Quentin Tarantino is just too cool to make !
But you know what, it just reminded me of some innocence of days gone by...It tells me to go back and watch all those movies to which it paid homage ! I'm telling you, I actually liked all of them too! If you can get over the fact that there's little plot, and not much of a script, and just appreciate the low-budget action, weaponry, and B- movieness, then you might just leave the theater with a smile !
