Rating of
0.5/4
What a Joke
Terry - wrote on 10/26/23
The Eternals are here! Oh that's rank! Really, they suddenly show up and Sersi gives a bullshit reason as to why they didn't stop Thanos. "We are only allowed to get involved when Deviants are messing up stuff." That didn't stop Druig from doing whatever he wanted. That didn't stop Phastos from making technology for humans. The Eternals didn't even just get involved in stopping The Deviants. They literally helped them farm and made them contraptions. Oh, looks like you are getting involved in human affairs even though it doesn't help you ward off Deviants. Like, how does farming help stop Deviants? A big wall around the city makes sense, but farming sure as heck looks they are just helping humans by doijg more than just getting involved when Deviants are involved. Somehow Sersi finds it to be a good excuse to say that stopping Thanos wasn't part of the plan, when farming doesn't get rid of Deviants! You literally got involved with humans when you apparently said yourself that you were only supposed to stop the Deviants! "Oh we aren't supposed to stop Thanos, let's just look away when we didn't for hundreds of years." What a stupid excuse that doesn't make sense! Movies can be as unrealistic as they want, but this is just plain unbelievable. I want to at least believe what is happening even if it's unrealistic. I don't believe this at all! I see no passion or truth! The action doesn't have the same pizazz as sone of the other Marvel Cinematic Universe movies. It doesn't have believable characters, dialogue, or a fresh plot. The world is ending! …Again… Okay, why does this have to be another world-ending threat? Perhaps they thought it made sense because the titular Eternals are powerful. I understand that. However, the movie is bloated and it is too stuffed for a two hour movie. Why isn't this a mini-series? There simultaneously too much here and not enough. Too many characters to focus on in just two hours and thirty minutes? Check! The explanations are short and don't make sense? Check! It drags on? Check! It should have been longer? Check! You get the idea. An episodic mini-series could have paced it better and gave it more depth. I don't believe the characters because there are too many and they have very little screentime. Ikaris also kills himself, and it's shown as a "villain was sad so he flew into the sun and the writers killed him like that because they ran out of ideas." In theory the suicide should be sad, and in many movies this is depressing, but Ikaris killing himself is so poorly handled that I feel nothing for him. If they fleshed-out Ikaris he would feel like a person, and many a times I view characters as people. Here though, Ikaris is a plank of rotting wood, and he dying meant nothing to me and it really irks me that they botched up a suicide scene so bad that I felt nothing for the guy, but then again the movie is also just a piece of wood, bland and lifeless. The visuals loon good to you? I am glad. I understand that there is effort, and sometimes we feel something from this. I even kind of liked Sprite on my most recent rewatch, but overall I never liked the movie. The Eternals as characters had an inclusion that didn't sit right with me and I am not the only one. Eternals gets a 0.5/4 from me, but on some days I find it to be utterly worthless. I am glad it made some people happy though, I just personally don't like it.
