Rating of
1/4
South Park hit the nail on the head with Indy Rape
hawkeye6287 - wrote on 07/20/09
Where to start with this film - well the first 15 mins are not too bad. I didn't actually mind the nuking of the fridge to much. Sure it was ridiculous but Indiana films have never been that down to earth. Ford has still got it as Dr Jones and LaBeouf was not as irritating as I thought he would be.
That is that can be said in this films favour, I can find nothing else nice to say about it. The plot was ridiculous, and I'm not talking about the involvement of aliens - we've had voodoo, Ark of the convenant etc so aliens are no more outrageous. But what the hell were they thinking with Ray Winstones character - i'm good, i'm bad, i'm good again - only joking i;m bad , it just got tedious. John Hurt should be embarrassed that he took his part he was perhaps the worst of a group of appallingly written characters. Maybe thats unfair K.Allen might have been worse.
Special mention to Cate Blanchett as the least intimidating/convincing evil russian in the history of cinema. The interesting thing is that most of the people involved are good actors and yet none of them managed to see how awfully written this film was. The dialog is attrocius (as is my spelling) and play no part in moving the film on as we are left to await another CGI set piece.
We were promised an old school film, with real action that didn't rely on CGI for its kicks. What the hell Speilberg. Not only was there so much pointless CGI that you might as well have done the whole thing like that but it looked rubbish as well. At no point could you even begin to confuse the CGI stuff for the real thing, which is the whole point of it. I suspect alot of this films problems stem from Lucas, who in my mind should never be allowed near a film ever again.
At the end of the day Indy 4 was just a bad film. Bad plot, awful script, some bad acting, decrepid CGI with some very patronising scenes thrown in. Yes i'm talking about the ridiculously slow shadow rotation to show the skull they have looks like the one in the (looks about 10 years old) wall painting. Oh really the big elongated skull you've been carrying around the whole film looks alot like the big elongated head on the wall. Yes cos no one spotted that before you took 3 minutes to slowly rotate the shadow of the skull till it overlaid the one on the painting with the big revealing muscial score and made it all clear thank. Thanks for assuming your audience are as dumb as you appear to have become Spielberg and Lucas.
I loved the first three Indy Films aswell as most of Spielbergs other films, but this script should never have seen the light of day.
