TheWolf's Movie Review of Alone in the Dark (2005)

Uwe Boll must be stopped!!!
TheWolf - wrote on 08/09/07

Uwe Boll became known to the world with the video game horror based film House of the Dead. After the horrible reviews and box office, someone somewhere decided to let Uwe Boll destroy another video game franchise, this time it's another horror video game, Alone in the Dark. Which frankly is how you should watch the movie, if you have to that is.
Alone in the Dark goes wrong in so many directions, the first would have to be the screenplay, which has too many plot holes and confusing storyline that no one can tell what is going on. Throw into the mix a director that has no clue what he is doing except throwing an explosion here and a shootout there. Boll did one thing right, make the movie about soldiers shooting creatures, instead of your everyday party goers, such as seen in House.
Alone in the Dark suffers from a lot of different things, but even if you didn't know who Uwe Boll is or how bad the script actually is, you must be able to notices the horrible casting job. Who in their right mind would think of Tara Reid for a genius anthropologist? Her lines range from horribly delivered, to "hey look over here" or "hey check this out". Slater plays an Indiana Jones type character, who lacks the charm, wit, courage, intelligence...basically everything that makes Indiana Jones.
Stephen Dorff isn't that bad of an actor, he just has the unfortunate curse of choosing bad movie roles. Either he needs a new agent, or needs to get better material thrown his way. Frankly military leader hunting the beast who has conflict with the lead character doesn't do him justice.
A lot of the scenes are laughable when Boll tries to make them hip for the new generation. Such as the characters being in total darkness, then shooting the bullets that have lights on them which light up the characters and the screen. Boll should take some directing lessons and not try to make something look appealing.