Rating of
0.5/4
Amazon best price is FIVE CENTS! That means bad!
TheWolf - wrote on 04/02/08
A gigantic rusty razor blade slip n' slide, that has been sitting in the Florida sun in early August and has been doused with a combination of rubbing alcohol, bleach, ammonia, and sulfuric acid. That is a description of the toy that I would take running slides down in nothing more than a bathing suit and I would do it with a gigantic grin on my face if it meant that I could forget ever having watched this movie.
For those of you unaware of Uwe Bol. He is a director that loves to make video games into movies. He also loves to blatantly insert clips from the games into his film to "make it more like the game". Eventually I think he will simply hook up a DVR to a game console and just record someone playing it and apply his name to it.
Mr. Bol has 12 million dollars to make this movie. 12 million can go one out of two ways, it can be spread out over the entire length of the film adding a few good effects and having a tight story line and what amounts to be a moderately budgeted film that could do really well at the box office. Or you can spend all of it on a couple Matrix style bullet-time effects and skimp on the unnecessary things like a plot or a script.
Guess which direction he went? WE'VE GOT BULLET-TIME PEOPLE!
Usually I try to find something good to say about Uwe Bol's movies before I trash them, but I have to admit that this movie was so piss poor I couldn't even come up with a single enjoyable thing to say about it.
